The Last Day

Well I have been off work for 4 days now and it is quite strange. Boring to say the least since I sit around and do nothing almost all day. I sit around and read, walk around the lake, sleep late and sit around on the internet way to long.

My last day was sad but I really had no emotions about it almost the entire day. I remember asking all the former teachers, "What's it feel like? Are you excited? Why aren't you excited I'd be bouncing around happy."

But I wasn't. I was happy for sure but mostly just numb to the fact that it was over. I finally understood what they were feeling. Sure my experience there was never the best one. And as always when it's over and you can look back on it and think, "Oh well, it really wasn't that bad." But I know it kind of was. I really had no extreme feelings. The kids still made me angry at times and at other times they made me laugh. It was like any other day, but they knew. If I could stay their teacher I would. I love those kids.

Princeton class was my first of the day and Harris, who I love, was ignoring me. He wasn't happy that I was leaving. Aimee, who never really talked to me a whole lot but was super sweet, looks at me and says quietly, "Teacher don't go," and I wanted to say, "Okay, I won't."

I used to sing "Where I stood" by Missy Higgins to Stanford class. On the last day they sang it for me. They couldn't remember a lot of the words but it was still amazing. I have it on my camera but unfortunately I left my camera cord somewhere.

I ate lunch with Harvard class who used to scream with, I'm not exaggerating, sheer happiness when I walked into their class. I'll never forget that, "Yay Ashley Teacher!" I still don't know why they liked me so much. Maybe it was because I taught them cartoon network and they got to watch TV with me. I didn't regularly teach them on Mondays so I asked their head teacher if I could eat with them. They were so happy and I was glad to sit with them.

I visited Yale class. Every time Sue sees me she screams, "ASHLEY TEACHER!" So cute. And she learned how to say, "What is that?" So she would ask me that every day.

Brown class was the same. I had gotten into the habit of telling them to punch out their cards nicely. So the kids would say, "Teacher me punching nicely." And I would laugh and give them a happy face. "Who's punching nicely?"

Dartmouth class was the last. Rosa was not happy with me leaving. She practically begged me in that kid whiny voice to stay. "Why do you have to go?" she asked. "Because I have to." It's hard to explain to these kids that I signed a contract that meant I would be here for only a year and that my year was up. She told me, "I love Ashley teacher. Ashley teacher is my favorite," and I just wanted to pick her up and take her with me.

At the end of the day I went up to the playroom to say goodbye. The Korean teacher was in there singing some song with them to get them to listen and not talk. I waited for a time to interrupt to say goodbye. My boss came up and told them that I was leaving and to say bye to me. Gabriel said, "Thank you for teaching me," and kind of teared up. It broke my heart. How can you leave these kids? Brian said he would go home and cry for four hours. I didn't cry but I was sad. Took a few more pictures said goodbye and got ready for my afternoon classes.

I think the saddest thing is that they won't remember me because they're so young. I always joked with them, "Don't be sad! When Ashley teacher is gone you'll be like, 'YAY no more Ashley teacher!' and then we'll have a party." They laughed but it's the truth. Kids forget and they forget fast. But I'll remember them and I'll wonder what they're doing with there lives.

Anyways I'm preparing for Southeast Asia now. I can't believe that it's coming up in 26 days. All the rest of my friends are ending their contracts soon. It's sad to think I'll never be around these people again. No more game nights. No more ridiculous late nights at Hongdae and taking a taxi at 3 in the morning only to all hang out again at the park the next day. I'm going to miss this. I miss it already.